Whats in a name...?

Over the weekend I saw 'My name is Khan'. It was a good movie considering a Karan Johar standard, though little too dramatic in the second half. The female protagonist in the film Mandira (played by Kajol) is a divorcee with a son who marries Rizwan Khan (played by Shahrukh Khan) and hence adopts the title Khan by marriage, though a Hindu by birth. Her life changed for the name that she carried with her then and post 9/11 she loses son to a communal fight that happens in his school. Had she kept her maiden name would life be different for her was a question she had in her mind.

And thats the topic I have been wanting to write for a while now. Is it really that important for a girl to adopt her husbands name after marriage. Who decides the importance and why? A name given at birth becomes the identity of the person and changing that overnight is it not like changing one's true identity?Is it legally required or socially neccesary?

Recently an employee who has been married for 2 years came up to me with a request to change her name to that of her husbands, because her husband has been insistent about it. I mean, get a life Man! Are you really that insecure? How does it matter to the man whether his wife takes up his title or not. But It definitely matters to the girl . Would it be that simple for a guy to do the same if required?

My parents haven't quit even after 6 years of my marriage reminding me to change my name (Which of course i haven't done, incase you haven't figured that out yet). All the women who actually have their name changed, am sure would not have done it if there was no compulsion or social obligation. I just fail to understand how it matters to anyone how I want to write my name, but it definitely matters to me. My name is what I identify myself with and I want the world to identify me with. So while I get to hear Whats in a name all the time from my folks, I would like to tell everyone with the same school of thought that Everything is in the name!
My name is Paal, Tithee Paal!